Did Somebody Say... SEX!

Free Rent for Sex
The 10 best Advertisements I’ve seen on the Net:

1. San Francisco: “I usually rent the room for $600, but if you are really ticklish and willing to trade being tickled for the extra rent then we have a deal.” (Tickle-Me-Elmo, this one’s got your name all over it!)
   
2. Denver: “This is not how it sounds; but I am looking for sex to rent out my upstairs apartment.” (I think this is exactly how it sounds.)
   
3. New York: “Take care of my needs at my every whim, and live rent free… Interested?” (Now that’s not too much to ask for, is it?)
   
4. San Francisco: “Seeking female that likes to be nude… nothing more expected.” (And I should believe this… because?)
   
5. Washington: “Sex and a little light office duty; desire for cigars is a must. Perfect for that girl who is skilled and willing.” (Clinton? Is that you?)
   
6. Florida: “Upscale executive seeks beautiful female 18-24 to live in his luxury condo in Coral Gables for $1/month in exchange for some light duties. Help take care of dog, cook occasionally, plus have sex with me 2 times a week." (You had her till the $1 a month thing; now your just another typical cheap @$$.)
   
7. Florida: "FREE RENT FOR A PARTY GIRL!!!!!!! If you like to party and don't want to pay rent, well then send a pic and some info about yourself. If I like what I see, I'll email you more." (Actually send us your pic, and if we don’t puke, then maybe we’ll see.)
   
8. Denver: “Two woman playing naked Twister; a bottle of wine, and free rent… What do you say?” (I say give me your address; and I’ll be right up.)
   
9. New York City: “Very large comfortable apartment on a high floor with great views. I'm a male 35 years old looking for a female 21-35 who will occasionally not wear clothes when I ask in exchange for free rent and her own private room. No sex whatsoever. The apartment is private, clean, quiet, elevator, sunny, safe, etc.” (What a great deal! Private and safe; you’ll just have to ignore the creepy weird guy in the corner staring at you all the time.)
   
10. Atlanta: “Got sex? I got room and board. Call me…” (Simple, blunt; to the point. I like it!)